I've been a pediatric speech-language pathologist for 11 years who works with families who have children with a variety of issues (from not talking or not eating as expected) for a variety of reasons. My profession is talking and I'm an amateur singer/songwriter. I know only my family have heard my songs, but I've written over 30 and the only thing that would give me the confidence to sing for a larger audience would be to trust my voice. In high school I was a soprano in choir and I come from a long line of entertainers. My parents were in a band when I was a kid and my dad continued a "one man band" until 5 years ago. My sisters have both recorded in studios and one was the lead singer of a band. Their daughters blow me away with their studio recordings!! Now, I'm a definite low alto with a range of about 7 notes... seriously. When I try to go higher... it's just air or a screaching sound. That said, no public kareoke for me... or when I do, I will be mouthing many of the words! The issues of a hoarse voice started about 10 years ago, but really has gotten worse in the past 2 to 5. So, they found a CYST on my vocal cord and suggested I have it removed. I decided to do it sooner than later because my voice is my profession, my JOY, my life. If I look at it as a sign from God, He would be telling me to take care of my voice... you only get one.
The clencher was that my insurance is changing in July. I know the surgery and voice therapy is covered 100% right now. Thus, the one hour procedure is scheduled for next Tuesday (5/18) which will be followed by two weeks of complete vocal rest. SILENCE. WHOAH. Here are the rules:
I must not:
• Speak
• Sing
• Hum
• Whisper
• Cough
• Throat clear
• Laugh (I can smile!)
• Lift or push heavy objects
• Make forceful efforts during bowel movements (I don't have to worry about this!lol)
• Smoke (luckily quit 5 years ago)
This will be a very interesting journey that I will share with you because I will NEED to know that I am communicating with my friends! I'm not one for lengthy texting or phone conversations, but I've always loved to write!
The hardest part may be parenting my 3 y/o especially since Andy is a fire fighter so there will be days that are just the two of us... I rented a communication device so I will be able to program 32 messages with my voice to talk to my little guy.
Maybe I should make an overlay for talking with my hubby?? 32 opportunities to say what I need to say!!
It's such a trip to think about the "messages" I will want and need to say to my 3 year old and my hubby!!
The icing on the top of this cake will not be being able to sing my heart out, but seeing COMMUNICATION from my little patients perspective for an ever-so-brief time compared. If I get frustrated, I will have a small taste of how they may feel. It is always my goal to become a better speech-language pathologist... I can tell this is going to be BIG in those terms.
I hope you will enjoy, find humor in and maybe even help me see the MANY gifts that will come from this once in a lifetime experience...
I'll post in FB when I update this blog if I can.
Love to all!
Snow
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Very interesting...all of it. You have a great outlook on it for sure. You'll be fine and in years you'll be able to look back and laugh at how nervous you were. Sending you lots of luck and that the two weeks will fly by. Hang in there :)
ReplyDeleteI love that you are blogging this experience! I look forward to following it! :)
ReplyDeleteDear Snow, Life (or God, if you prefer) has a funny way of letting us 'sit in the other seat.'
ReplyDeleteIn my early years of counseling, I worked with folks who lived in rural Pima County. One proud former cowboy was bucked off a horse injuring his back. He was unable to work and did not qualify for disability (had not paid into social security) and there was no health care available then. The referral was by the kids' teacher; his children were hungry, and he wouldn't sign them up for free lunches, and wouldn't apply for food stamps. "No one in my famiily has ever been on welfare!" I pointed out he'd paid taxes (just not SS) and this was his way to be reimbursed for what he'd paid into and HIS CHILDREN WERE HUNGRY!
A few weeks later, the 'soft-money' grant that had funded my position went to some other agency (political winds being what they are!) and I was suddenly unemployed. I had often gone to DES with a client as advocate, but it felt VERY DIFFERENT to be on the needy side of the desk! I swallowed my pride and applied for unemployment and food stamps. I've never forgotten that lesson!
Personally I don't see any "reason" for you having it, but I know you are the kind of person who will use the opportunity to learn from it and carry additional insights into the future. A friend of mine who is a voice teacher and opera singer has a very similar procedure for an abnormal blood vessel on her vocal cord -- it also took months til anyone figured out what it was. She had the no talking and all that for 3 weeks, also, and she is now back to singing. So while I am sure it is upsetting, it's just a short time in your life. I'll look forward to your future postings on here! Sending you a virtual hug --- Sheryl P.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great idea, Snow. Thank you for sharing this journey with the world. Have you ever seen the movie, "The Doctor"? It stars William Hurt, Mandy Patinkin, and I can't remember the female lead right now. VERY interesting movie, and part of it actually involves what you are about to go through.
ReplyDeleteI will definitely be following and praying for you, as always.
Kathy
Dear Snow,
ReplyDeleteI follow many friends blogs and find it is a great way to share your life's experiences with words. As scary as it seems now soon it will be all over and behind you and what you take from it will be amazing. You have all my love and support and I know that Andrew and Garith will take great care of you! Looking forward to your posts and love you very much! Hugs!